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Work-Life Out of Balance
In the corporate world, I had a job that I loved. My title was Accounting Specialist, and it was totally suited for my introvert personality because I could spend the day fairly much alone in my cubicle doing figure work. That was probably why I excelled at my job so quickly.
In addition to my regular work hours, there was always plenty of overtime, and I never called in sick. When I did take time off, I often received phone calls during the day or night to help with balancing problems. That was how dedicated I was to my job, I wanted to retire working at that company, or, so, I thought.
Mini Prophecy
One day while at work, I was thinking about how much I loved my job, and then, all of a sudden, I had what I call a mini prophecy. It started out as an eyelid flutter that got my attention, and, as I rubbed it out, a still small voice within me said, “Don’t love it too much because it's not going to last.” I thought that was weird and shrugged it off because there was no way I was not going to love my job. Nevertheless, I pondered that event every now and then wondering about it.
Mini Prophecy Fulfilled
Sometime later, new management took over in our area with one manager in particular that stood out. He was loud, rude, and arrogant with a continuous entourage of men surrounding him wherever he went, when you'd talked to him, it was always to his back as he walked off from you, and you could always hear him say to someone around the office, “You are only as good as your last project.”
Also, among the new management team were a group of partying managers that favored the partying employed; the atmosphere became politically toxic more so than normal that I started noticing how badly some of the bosses were treating some employees, and, I thought, “Hmm, if they can do that to them, they can do that to me.” That got me thinking that maybe my loyalties were misplaced.
Around the same time, the long and crazy hours were taking its toll on me. I felt burned out and fatigued, and a sense of uneasiness settled in. That sense of uneasiness was persistent. No matter how many times I gave myself a pep-talk about how everything is good, I love my job, don't worry, be happy, quit complaining, that sense of uneasiness would settle back in.
I started desiring a work-life balance, but the usual tips for one such as prioritize, learn to say no, don’t answer the phone, stop being the hero, were not going to work for me; since, I was always there when the company needed me, that's what they expected. I had to make a clean break; a work-life balance became so important that I quit my job.
If you are experiencing a work-life crisis, quiet down, be alert and awake, and listen for the invitations of your Inner Guide. Sometimes they may come in the form of a nudge, or a yearning, or a longing, or a stirring, or like me, a sense of uneasiness. They are calls for us to step out and to be our best.
Lessons Learned
In my life, it seems I have always taken things to the extreme, and a job that I really loved was no different, but now, a job is not my life anymore, and time spent with God, nature, family, friends, pets, or alone are just as important if not more. I remember once mentioning to a Pastor that I could not regularly attend Sunday church services due to work, and he said, “Maybe you should find a new job.” I was somewhat put off by his response because he didn't know my situation, but in hindsight, he was right; I just wasn't ready to receive it.
Starting Over
Off on an Adventure is the title of my next post! I will explain how I moved on from the crushing blow of an out-of-balance work-life, and the end of my job of many years to move into a new direction, which brought about needed balances in other areas as well.
In the corporate world, I had a job that I loved. My title was Accounting Specialist, and it was totally suited for my introvert personality because I could spend the day fairly much alone in my cubicle doing figure work. That was probably why I excelled at my job so quickly.
In addition to my regular work hours, there was always plenty of overtime, and I never called in sick. When I did take time off, I often received phone calls during the day or night to help with balancing problems. That was how dedicated I was to my job, I wanted to retire working at that company, or, so, I thought.
Mini Prophecy
One day while at work, I was thinking about how much I loved my job, and then, all of a sudden, I had what I call a mini prophecy. It started out as an eyelid flutter that got my attention, and, as I rubbed it out, a still small voice within me said, “Don’t love it too much because it's not going to last.” I thought that was weird and shrugged it off because there was no way I was not going to love my job. Nevertheless, I pondered that event every now and then wondering about it.
Mini Prophecy Fulfilled
Sometime later, new management took over in our area with one manager in particular that stood out. He was loud, rude, and arrogant with a continuous entourage of men surrounding him wherever he went, when you'd talked to him, it was always to his back as he walked off from you, and you could always hear him say to someone around the office, “You are only as good as your last project.”
Also, among the new management team were a group of partying managers that favored the partying employed; the atmosphere became politically toxic more so than normal that I started noticing how badly some of the bosses were treating some employees, and, I thought, “Hmm, if they can do that to them, they can do that to me.” That got me thinking that maybe my loyalties were misplaced.
Around the same time, the long and crazy hours were taking its toll on me. I felt burned out and fatigued, and a sense of uneasiness settled in. That sense of uneasiness was persistent. No matter how many times I gave myself a pep-talk about how everything is good, I love my job, don't worry, be happy, quit complaining, that sense of uneasiness would settle back in.
I started desiring a work-life balance, but the usual tips for one such as prioritize, learn to say no, don’t answer the phone, stop being the hero, were not going to work for me; since, I was always there when the company needed me, that's what they expected. I had to make a clean break; a work-life balance became so important that I quit my job.
Call for Change
After
being away from the situation for a while, I believe that the persistent
uneasiness I experienced during the last several years at my job was guidance from the Holy Spirit to make a change.
Words of AdviceIf you are experiencing a work-life crisis, quiet down, be alert and awake, and listen for the invitations of your Inner Guide. Sometimes they may come in the form of a nudge, or a yearning, or a longing, or a stirring, or like me, a sense of uneasiness. They are calls for us to step out and to be our best.
Lessons Learned
In my life, it seems I have always taken things to the extreme, and a job that I really loved was no different, but now, a job is not my life anymore, and time spent with God, nature, family, friends, pets, or alone are just as important if not more. I remember once mentioning to a Pastor that I could not regularly attend Sunday church services due to work, and he said, “Maybe you should find a new job.” I was somewhat put off by his response because he didn't know my situation, but in hindsight, he was right; I just wasn't ready to receive it.
Starting Over
Off on an Adventure is the title of my next post! I will explain how I moved on from the crushing blow of an out-of-balance work-life, and the end of my job of many years to move into a new direction, which brought about needed balances in other areas as well.